When Christmas Isn't Merry: Coping with Addiction in the Festive Season

For many, December means celebration — gatherings, glitter, and good cheer. But for families living with addiction, it can also bring stress, anxiety, and heartbreak. Christmas can amplify emotions and expectations, and the sense that everyone else is happy can make personal struggles feel even heavier.

If your loved one is misusing alcohol or drugs, the festive period may come with extra challenges. Parties, alcohol, and disrupted routines can increase relapse risks. Tensions may rise around money, family roles, or unspoken disappointment. You might feel torn between wanting to help and wanting to protect yourself.

At Families Out Loud, we see you. And we know that December doesn’t always feel like a time of peace and goodwill.

1. Give yourself permission to feel

It’s okay if you’re not feeling festive. You don’t need to put on a brave face for others or pretend everything is fine. Try to acknowledge your feelings instead of fighting them — whether that’s sadness, frustration, anger, or guilt. Naming your emotions can help you release them.

2. Protect your boundaries

You are allowed to prioritise your well being. That might mean leaving a gathering early, saying no to certain conversations, or deciding not to serve alcohol at home. Setting boundaries isn’t selfish — it’s self-preservation. It helps you stay strong enough to keep caring in the long run.

3. Find your moments of calm

Even when chaos swirls around you, small rituals can make a difference: lighting a candle, going for a walk, listening to music, writing down three things you’re grateful for. These moments can help you reconnect with yourself.

4. Reach out for connection

Isolation is a heavy burden. Talking to someone who understands — whether that’s a friend, counsellor, or one of our FOL facilitators — can remind you that you’re not alone. Support groups can offer perspective, laughter, and relief.

5. Redefine what “Christmas” means

Maybe your celebration looks different this year — quieter, smaller, gentler. That’s okay. Traditions can change. Sometimes the most meaningful moments come when we let go of perfection and focus instead on honesty and care.

If this Christmas feels heavy, please know that help is available. Families Out Loud continues to provide support throughout the holiday season (with reduced hours over Christmas week). Whether you need to talk, listen, or simply share a moment of understanding, we are here.

You are not alone — even when it feels that way.